Do we have the right to be fickle?

لا يُصِلحُ النفسَ إذْ كانتْ مدبرةً .. إلا التنقل من حالٍ إلى حالِ

Is it a bad thing to be fickle? I recently learned this word. It means likely to change, especially in affections, intentions, loyalties, or preferences.

It was addressed to me as a criticism because I had changed my mind a few times.

Some people find it convenient to poke at your credibility when you contradict yourself.

I often get nasty looks from others because I held positions in the past which I no longer hold. I even get those looks for simple changes: I didn't use to like spicy foods; now I like them. I used to like tea; now I don't. I didn't used to like strength training; now I do. I didn't used to like Hatha yoga; now I do. I used to like a certain type of music; now I don't. I didn't used to like certain types of poetry; now I do.

People don't like it when you change your mind because they like predictability. It is easier to deal with things when you know what to expect.

But I think being fickle is a good thing. It means that you are evolving, searching for new and better things and not sticking to positions just because you are worried about what others will say.

I think part of a healthy life is feeling that you have the right to change your mind about how you feel about things, because it gives you the opportunity to correct bad decisions, to improve good ones, and to find better alternatives.

Sometimes you make a decision because the evidence as you know it at the time points to that particular decision, but then sometimes circumstances change or you come to a better understanding and awareness of things, which necessitates that you reverse that decision.

If a decision turns out to be a poor one than you should feel the right to change that decision, and not be stuck with a bad decision just because other people want predictability out of you.

Being fickle is better than being consistently wrong.

Why don't people like it when you are fickle?

I would understand why people would want predictability. Commitment and trust are important in human relationships from the personal level to the organizational to the political. I wouldn't want to marry someone who plans to leave any time he found something better.

It is very important to minimize harm and avoid causing inconveniences to others. What I am talking about here is changing your mind about things that don't impact anyone but you.

Not all decisions in life are bound by contracts. As long as our personal decisions don't affect others, we should feel flexible and free to explore new ideas and solutions.

Why should I stick to a bad decision just because I'm worried about what others will say? Who is living my life?

What could be wrong with being fickle?

Changing your mind too often does have a downside. If you change your mind too frequently then it is possible that you seek only instant gratification and you are not patient enough to let solutions take their course.

Being mindful means paying attention to the short term and long term cause-effect relationships.